What a joy to see Eric and Emily this morning at church...both wearing goofy grins that say, "I'm in love and I don't care if the whole world knows!" Apparently neither of them had a good night's sleep, both claiming the excitement of it all makes sleep pretty hard to come by.
Grace played and sang the song she'll be doing at the wedding for E&E and for us two moms. We told her the song was perfect, because it made both the moms cry. :)
I've surprised myself this past week at how easily and how often I've cried. My tears this time around are a little different than when Heidi got married. Any tears I shed at her wedding nine years ago were all for joy, knowing that she had the best guy on the planet for her. There was no doubt, no sadness, only joy. Don't panic, there is nor doubt or sadness this time, but it is admittedly different. With E&E, my tears recognize the beginning of a new life for Eric, and we have SO much to be thankful for. His adult life had a rocky start and seeing where he is today as opposed to where he was 7 years ago is absolutely overwhelming. He has become a man. He loves Jesus. He is pledging his life to love the woman of his dreams. And I couldn't feel more blessed. A few of the old memories come lurking to be met by the present reality and the happy tears start again. There were years of heartbreak and while I always clung to the belief that he would find his way back, it was so, so hard. Just look at him now and see what God has done. I couldn't be more proud of him.
I think I have another job to add to the list for this very busy week: cry as many tears as I possibly can so that by Sunday, I'll just be smiling.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
Staple-free, one crutch guy
Out with the staples, in with the steri-strips. Hooray! It was a good day. Pete is down to one crutch, and is hoping to walk unassisted and perform the wedding while standing. He has 11 days. We are hopeful.
The only disturbing part about yesterday's appointment was the discussion on radiation. The dr. said because of the proximity to his femur, the weakening of the bone by radiation would increase the chances of a break. That didn't sound good... He also talked about the attack on the immune system, the "sunburn", rashes, and extreme fatigue. Since the tumor was self-contained and they cleaned out a rather large area around where the tumor was, one wonders if radiation is truly necessary. Pete is certainly asking that question and plans to do some more research before his first appointment with the radiation oncologist.
Besides preparing for radiation (or not), the next step is physical therapy. He has to wait another week, and then he can start. The fitness center he belongs to has both a physical therapist and a therapy pool. The therapy pool is AMAZING - from 3-5 feet deep (shallow to deep end), and a wonderful 85 degrees. I think just walking in it would be great for Pete's leg. Once it heals enough to be safe from infection, of course.
I'm living on lists now, with the wedding less than two weeks away. Write thank you notes - check. Plan rehearsal dinner - check. Mow the grass and weed - check. Next stop the basement!
I'm loving my new job - it's the kind of thing you can walk away from at night and forget about. Kind of nice not being in charge anymore.
The only disturbing part about yesterday's appointment was the discussion on radiation. The dr. said because of the proximity to his femur, the weakening of the bone by radiation would increase the chances of a break. That didn't sound good... He also talked about the attack on the immune system, the "sunburn", rashes, and extreme fatigue. Since the tumor was self-contained and they cleaned out a rather large area around where the tumor was, one wonders if radiation is truly necessary. Pete is certainly asking that question and plans to do some more research before his first appointment with the radiation oncologist.
Besides preparing for radiation (or not), the next step is physical therapy. He has to wait another week, and then he can start. The fitness center he belongs to has both a physical therapist and a therapy pool. The therapy pool is AMAZING - from 3-5 feet deep (shallow to deep end), and a wonderful 85 degrees. I think just walking in it would be great for Pete's leg. Once it heals enough to be safe from infection, of course.
I'm living on lists now, with the wedding less than two weeks away. Write thank you notes - check. Plan rehearsal dinner - check. Mow the grass and weed - check. Next stop the basement!
I'm loving my new job - it's the kind of thing you can walk away from at night and forget about. Kind of nice not being in charge anymore.
Wednesday, September 10, 2008
Finally, some good news
It's probably not fair to start out as if we haven't had any good news in a long time. Not too long ago we were blessed to learn that Pete is cancer-free again and that was really good news. But two surgeries in two weeks WAS rather depressing, prolonging the staple removal and the ability to take a shower even longer. It's amazing how long three weeks feels when you have a leg full of staples (22 the first time - and only 19 the second time...Pete complained he'd been short changed). Personally, I think that two weeks is an awfully long time to leave staples in, remembering the difficulty of staple removal after a week following my third c-section. Just to clarify - Pete had surgery to remove the margins around his tumor site, and one week later had to go back for the removal of a hematoma. The staples had to stay in two weeks following surgery #2, thus the three week staple marathon.
But I WAS going somewhere with all of this...oh yes, the good news. We were admittedly a little nervous about yesterday's appointment as the wound site seemed a little pink and a little warm to me the other day, and the thought of MORE surgery was absolutely and in every way unthinkable. Well, thankfully, we don't have to think about it, because yesterday's news was good. Dr. H. removed the drain (and yes, that did hurt a bit), and said Pete can take a shower on Friday and the staples will come out next week. Hip hip hooray! I felt almost as relieved yesterday as I did when the scans came back clean. Yippee!
Pete has taken off his leg brace long enough to drive himself to work a couple of days this week. Today was a not so good day (he has good days and less than good days lately) and so he came home early and put himself to bed. He was careful to point out that he'll count this as his day off and work Friday (his regular day off) instead. Ever the over-achiever.
The days are flying by and soon the wedding excitement will begin. I haven't cleaned the house in a month and am thinking it's probably time, before the company starts arriving. We are all SOOOO excited - Heidi & family, my parents and two brothers are coming, as are my aunt and cousin, Pete's spiritual parents, friends from college/Air Force, friends from Rockford, and more. (No, they're not all staying here.) Weddings are such a fun reason to get together, and we're looking forward to it. The bride and groom are getting a little nervous about the planning of the service since Dad has been down for so long, but it will all come together in the end.
But I WAS going somewhere with all of this...oh yes, the good news. We were admittedly a little nervous about yesterday's appointment as the wound site seemed a little pink and a little warm to me the other day, and the thought of MORE surgery was absolutely and in every way unthinkable. Well, thankfully, we don't have to think about it, because yesterday's news was good. Dr. H. removed the drain (and yes, that did hurt a bit), and said Pete can take a shower on Friday and the staples will come out next week. Hip hip hooray! I felt almost as relieved yesterday as I did when the scans came back clean. Yippee!
Pete has taken off his leg brace long enough to drive himself to work a couple of days this week. Today was a not so good day (he has good days and less than good days lately) and so he came home early and put himself to bed. He was careful to point out that he'll count this as his day off and work Friday (his regular day off) instead. Ever the over-achiever.
The days are flying by and soon the wedding excitement will begin. I haven't cleaned the house in a month and am thinking it's probably time, before the company starts arriving. We are all SOOOO excited - Heidi & family, my parents and two brothers are coming, as are my aunt and cousin, Pete's spiritual parents, friends from college/Air Force, friends from Rockford, and more. (No, they're not all staying here.) Weddings are such a fun reason to get together, and we're looking forward to it. The bride and groom are getting a little nervous about the planning of the service since Dad has been down for so long, but it will all come together in the end.
Monday, September 8, 2008
The picture that wasn't
I took a picture of Pete's leg today, for posterity, or for future reference, or for just remembering where we've been. I thought briefly about posting it here but was quickly censored, in fact, the words had hardly come out my mouth when something about privacy issues or HEPA or something shot back at me from his mouth and the whole idea was laid to rest before it ever had a chance at life.
Oh well. You probably didn't really want to see it anyway.
Oh well. You probably didn't really want to see it anyway.
Thursday, September 4, 2008
If you get queasy easy, skip this post
Pete had his follow-up check on Tuesday and the first clue that something wasn't quite right was the look on the PA's face when she removed the dressing. Pete's leg was every shade of black and blue and swollen and tender, probably more than it should have been after a week. She suggested that this could be a problem.
His oncologist seconded the motion and ordered him to the hospital for a second surgery to clean out the wound to remove a hematoma, which obviously made Pete very sad, having just spent his first day in a week feeling, well...he was almost afraid to admit it...somewhat good. His surgery was yesterday afternoon, and we brought him home this morning. I stayed with him last night, trying unsuccesfully to sleep in the recliner in his room, which I would liken to an instrument of torture. One plus was the ability to watch two quarter final matches at the US Open aired on cable in "primetime". Who knew that "primetime" means starting a tennis match in the late evening, finishing before midnight and then turning around and starting another? We watch Serena barely beat Venus and then Rafa Nadal take down Mardy Fish, a player with lots of game who is a little short on mental toughness. So the night was not a total loss.
Heather is here this afternoon, working from a much more comfortable recliner. Pete is sleeping, and I'm afraid to sleep any more (I got in a couple of hours) for fear I won't sleep tonight.
It seems that the hematoma was a bit bigger than first expected. When Dr. H. held out his hands (as in the commercial "you're in good hands with Allstate") he was holding the imaginary blob. His PA said, "Well you should be having some extra pain tonight. I had my hand inside your leg." Ouch. Dr. H. took a picture of the monster laying on the table next to a ruler and it was 5" long and 3" high.
I think it's safe to say Pete should begin to feel better now, providing he doesn't have any more hematoma issues. Dr. H. said this morning that it looked like a huge pile of grape jelly. I'll never eat another PBJ, and thanks to me, you may not either. There is a bigger drain tube in his leg, and we got some new instructions on how to "strip" it (move the blood along to the receptacle to avoid clots forming and blocking the way).
I just have to say that my new boss (and the HR head) has been terrific in this difficult time, giving me time off at the beginning of the school year to be at Pete's side. This week, half the middle school is at a nearby camp having an "outdoor education" experience, so that helps things be a little less crazy at school.
Needless to say, "there's no place like home", and we're certainly happy to be here.
His oncologist seconded the motion and ordered him to the hospital for a second surgery to clean out the wound to remove a hematoma, which obviously made Pete very sad, having just spent his first day in a week feeling, well...he was almost afraid to admit it...somewhat good. His surgery was yesterday afternoon, and we brought him home this morning. I stayed with him last night, trying unsuccesfully to sleep in the recliner in his room, which I would liken to an instrument of torture. One plus was the ability to watch two quarter final matches at the US Open aired on cable in "primetime". Who knew that "primetime" means starting a tennis match in the late evening, finishing before midnight and then turning around and starting another? We watch Serena barely beat Venus and then Rafa Nadal take down Mardy Fish, a player with lots of game who is a little short on mental toughness. So the night was not a total loss.
Heather is here this afternoon, working from a much more comfortable recliner. Pete is sleeping, and I'm afraid to sleep any more (I got in a couple of hours) for fear I won't sleep tonight.
It seems that the hematoma was a bit bigger than first expected. When Dr. H. held out his hands (as in the commercial "you're in good hands with Allstate") he was holding the imaginary blob. His PA said, "Well you should be having some extra pain tonight. I had my hand inside your leg." Ouch. Dr. H. took a picture of the monster laying on the table next to a ruler and it was 5" long and 3" high.
I think it's safe to say Pete should begin to feel better now, providing he doesn't have any more hematoma issues. Dr. H. said this morning that it looked like a huge pile of grape jelly. I'll never eat another PBJ, and thanks to me, you may not either. There is a bigger drain tube in his leg, and we got some new instructions on how to "strip" it (move the blood along to the receptacle to avoid clots forming and blocking the way).
I just have to say that my new boss (and the HR head) has been terrific in this difficult time, giving me time off at the beginning of the school year to be at Pete's side. This week, half the middle school is at a nearby camp having an "outdoor education" experience, so that helps things be a little less crazy at school.
Needless to say, "there's no place like home", and we're certainly happy to be here.
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